faith

When I look back on the 2025, there’s a lot. There were a lot of moments of joy and celebration and there were also moments of heartbreak. The good ones are easy to reflect on, easy to show gratitude for- kids thriving and doing what they are meant to do, family time, friends that gather around, time with Adam, vacations and just every day moments of joy- those are easy because they are wrapped up in the good stuff.

The moments of heartbreak are more difficult to reflect on. I don’t really want to remember the heartbreak and the moments where I thought I wouldn’t get back up. I don’t want to remember the hurt and I definitely don’t want to be thankful for the hard. At the end of the school year, when I was asked over and over (and over and over) what was next for me, I didn’t know. I didn’t have an answer for those people but I did think I would have it figured out by now. I truly thought I would have some job that filled me with purpose, that I was passionate about; but not yet.

In the moments where I get frustrated or anxious that things haven’t gone like I thought, I try to remind myself that this time I have is a gift. It has given me space to drink my coffee at a slower pace and really read my Bible. I have time to sit and think and reflect, and I don’t want to waste that. I guess what I’m saying, is that as hard as the hard has been, I am thankful for it. I wouldn’t have the perspective I have today without it. I wouldn’t be able to pray the way I do today, without it. Nothing would be the same. There is nothing wasted with God and I am seeing that more and more.

So what’s next? I am not completely sure. I have ideas of what I think would be great but I am holding my hands open just wanting to go where God wants me. For now, I will give thanks for the sweet moments and the hard moments. (I will need to be reminded to give thanks for the hard moments by tomorrow, I’m sure.) I have no clue where you are with gratitude or the moments in your life but I pray that you can see the bigger picture God has for you and those around you. If you are in the hard, I pray that you feel held and comforted. If you are in the sweet, I pray that you can give thanks for those moments. I pray that all of us can see the Lord’s fingerprints on our lives today.

Last month, I spent a day at our church’s high school camp. My husband had to be in Flagstaff for work so I went with him and while he was at the office, I hung out with my friends at camp. (By the way, I LOVE camp with students!)

During worship, they sang the song, “Owe You Praise” (Elevation Worship & Chandler Moore). I’m sure you can tell by the name that it is about praise. The first few lines get me-
“You woke me up this morning
Yeah, my cup is overflowing
You have blessed me and I know it
So I owe you my praise”
There are no truer words.

Then the chorus-
“When I think of all you’ve done
When I think of all you’ve brought me through
When I think about your love
I could never say enough thank yous”

Something hit me that day. I find myself in a valley, confused and a little lost as to “what’s next” but also on the mountaintop, so grateful for this life. I am at a time in my life where I am keenly aware of how amazing the Lord is and how he has blessed me. It’s weird to be on the mountain and in the valley but I am so, so thankful for it. I am doing my best not to rush through the valley, not trying to get out of it on my own. I am doing my best to lean in to the Lord and learn what he has for me in this. But while I’m there, it doesn’t have to be crisis mode. I can take those mountaintop moments- laughing with my family, one on one time with my kids, time with friends, time with the Lord, Saturday nights with junior highers- all of those moments are amazing and I am so thankful for them.

God is so, so good. I am doing my best to trace his goodness in my life. I think it’s easy to see that goodness on the mountaintop but harder in the valley. Some of the times that have been the hardest have also been the sweetest. It is a gift to see God’s goodness in the valley.

I’m not sure if you can relate to the whole “being in 2 places at once” thing; it’s a weird place to be. I can be thankful on the mountaintops and in the valleys. God is good not some of the time, but all of the time. Sometimes we don’t immediately see it but his goodness is there and I am thankful for that. I also don’t want to miss it. I don’t want to miss one moment. Maybe I’ll write more about the moments- I am going to try and literally trace his goodness in my life which will be hard at times and easier at others but it always leads back to his provision, care, and love for me.

Tag: faith

Mountaintops and Valleys